Never Alone
by AliceCullen-Hale.1901
Summary: Edward comes back to Forks to find out that Bella has committed suicide. How does he react?
1. Time Is Running Out

**So this is my new collab FF. The entire reason that my other story hasnt been updated. Yes I did say collab. I am writing this story with xlady-cullenx. Yep she's awesome and I love her to death! But I hope you guys like reading this. So, Enjoy! :) **

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**ALICE'S POV**

I sat all alone, thinking again. I had isolated myself from the others. It had been about 4 months since we had left that small town. Sure we had left plenty of places before, but this time was different, everyone knew. It was her. Bella. The one name that could make our whole family go silent. One name that meant so much to the whole family. One name that made me wish I could cry or sleep. Why? To pass the time I had to stay away from my best friend. To pass the time I had to see my brother act the way he did. He didn't even stay with us. He went out on his own for months at a time. This took a toll on the whole family. Even when he did stop by, he was different in so many ways. He never smiled or laughed anymore. His face was always cold and unemotional and his eyes were no longer the familiar liquid butterscotch but they were cold and hard now.

I couldn't bare to see the effect one human had on my family. I knew the effect she had on me and my brother was a little bit more that that of the others. She after all was my best friend.

I tried to keep myself from thinking about her and seeing her future. Edward didnt like thoughts of knew this as well. But he had something that I did not. He had gotten to at least say good-bye. He had told me a clean break would be better for not only me but Bella, as well. So far, I didnt see anyway that it would've been different, but of course, there was no arguing with Edward.

I remember the day so well. It was the night of her birthday. Edward had kept her busy while I decorated and got everything in order. They had arrived and all was well. Then, it was time to open presents. I gave Edward the box he asked for and he in turn gave it to Bella. As she went to open it, she sliced her finger. After that, all was a blur even for me. Jasper had lost control I know. He slammed into Edward trying to get at Bella. Emmett's vice hands had tightened around him as he and Rose drug my husband outside. Bella, being Bella had fallen and cut her arm a good bit. There was so much blood that even I had problems controlling myself. But I did it for her and my family. I got Carlisle a towel and went off to fetch his bag as they moved Bella to the table. I laid the bag there and then walked out of the room after quickly glanicing at Bella. The smell was unbearably mouthwatering. I went out on the lawn with the others, to check on Jasper.

I saw him there, his frame shaking as he leaned against a tree turned the opposite direction, away from me. I flitted over to his side and gave Emmett and Rose the okay to back up and give him some room. I looked at Esme who was looking down, ashamed. I felt a tinge of sadness at the effect this accident already had taken on the family. Just a few seconds. I knew Edward was already furious by the actions of my husband just moments before, but I of course wanted to help Jasper, not just get mad at him.

I looked up at my husband and saw the grief and agony on his face. Throwing my arms around him, I looked off to nowehere in particular. I was thinking of a way to calm him down and make him feel better. I coulnt stand for him to feel bad. I mean yeah he could've killed her but he didnt. So, thats what Im trying to focus on.

I let my arms drop to my side as I turned my gaze towards him. The moonlight shone on his face and illuminating him, making him look like an angel. He was beautiful and the thing I loved the most in the world. Even his scars were beautiful. They added something to him. Some would be scared of his appearance but it made me love him more. He was my hero and I was his heroine. We were a perfect match.  
I saw him turn to me and my face lit up, but his was not as happy. This was to be expected, i guess. I looked at the plains of his face, hard and rigid but still familiar. I saw the faint outline of a smile on his lips and knew there was hope.

"Let's hunt."

I took his hand and looked at him dead on. "Its okay, Jasper, you won't hurt her." I started "Ill help you."

I motioned for him to follow me off towards the woods. He stood up and stepped away from the tree and nodded. I took my free hand and stroked his cheek, letting my fingers trace the outline of a few of his scars. He shivered a little as I did this.

Finally I looked at him and let three simple words come from my mouth. "I love you." I saw him smile a bit more and he stepped up a little in the direction I was going to walk. He held my hand more firmly now as if he were saying dont ever leave me. I, in return, held his hand just as tightly without taking my eyes from his.

"Alright let's go." he said as he looked back at me with an intensity that wasn't there before. He was determined to do better, for me, himself, and the others.

I turned around and nodded at my other family members and gave them a small apologetic smile. I started to pic up speed gradually and as Jasper began to pick up speed, I ran. I ran to run away from the feeling that had been stirred up in the house. Even though I did not have Jasper's talent, I had felt all the emotions there, too. Anger. Dissapointment. Sadness. There was too much tension and I was running from it. I was free, if only for now. Jasper ran for the same reasons I did. Freedom.

We entered the woods and lept across the river. I climbed up into the trees and jumped and flipped from branch to branch, releasing the tension from my body and mind. Jasper ran below me. He was just as fast as I was, we were in unison in a way. I caught onto a branch and hurled myself from it and spiraled down flipping over and over until I landed on Jasper. I giggled as I jumped up.

"Sorry bout that." I said as I saw him almost laugh. I was having some effect on him and it made me feel a whole lot better. I held out my hand and he took it. I pulled him up but to my suprise, when he came up, he wrapped his arms tightly around my waist and crushed his lips to mine. I was taken aback but went along with him. He needed it, I guess, to help forget about earlier. Our lips moved in synchronicity as he held my neck securely, so that my face stayed close to his. I threw my arms over his shoulders, without breaking the rythym we had established. I was oblivious to everything else happening. The world stood still to me.

We continued like this for awhile until suddenly Jasper broke off and pulled back. I was still a little disoriented if you will. He turned and stared pacing about while I stood there for a second. I saw as he sat down against a tree nearby and put his head in his hands. I went over and sat next to him and pulled him closer and laid his head in my lap as I stroked his hair gently.

"What's wrong, dear?" I asked.  
"What's wrong? Are you serious? I almost **KILLED** her." he said angrily. I looked down and dropped my hands from his hair. He never got angry at me. This was taking a huge tole on him. I wanted to make it right. He had become silent, calming himself down maybe. I guess he felt the sadness radiating from me. He didnt mean to hurt my feelings, that I knew.

"Are you ready to hunt?" I asked still upset.

Jasper sat up and looked at me. He brought his hands to my face, brushing his fingers against my cheekbone and I saw the sadness in his eyes as he appologized.

"Im sorry. I shouldn't have snapped at you like that. Im having a hard time dealing with all this." he said as I listened.

"I understand. You're forgiven." I said my bad mood disintegrating as I saw him smile.

"Now what would I do without you?" he said before pulling me in for a quick kiss. When he pulled back and looked at me, I saw him. My husband and lover but moreover my rock and refuge, the one I turned to when I could count on no one else in the world. My light in the darkness I sometimes found myself in. But then I realized that he may be those things to me but I- I was those things to him as well. We needed each other, to be with each other. He was the missing part of me as I was the missing part of him. We completed each other. It was then that I saw what Edward had decided. We were leaving.

I masked my emotions so Jasper wouldnt detect anything unordinary as we hunted. I finished quite quickly, but I wasnt in as much need for hunting as Jasper was. I watched as he stalked his prey and gracefully and skillfuly pounced catching it on the neck and finishing it off. When he was done he looked over and smiled. I walked over and hugged him lightly. "Are you ready to go back?" I asked.

"Not really, but I have to do it sometime." he said taking my hand as we started off toward home. We didnt talk much on the way home. We just let the silence swallow our anxities as the house came into view. He squeezed my hand gently and I looked at him, giving him a reassuring smile. He gave a small smile in return.

I held his hand firmly as we walked up to the front door and opened it, stepping inside. I led him into the living room and let his hand go. Raising my hands, I looked at Edward.

"Edward, I already know what you're going to say alright..I saw it." I said standing in front of Jasper.

"Yeah. And what's that, Alice?"

"I know you're going to make us leave."

I had know his decision since earlier in the forest. I knew that Jasper was in the dark so to speak at the moment, but I hadn't told him for good reason.

"Your making it sound like it's _my_ fault." I heard my brother say.

"No, I just think you're making too big of a deal out of all this."

"'**Too** big of a deal?', are you **joking**? Didn't you see what just happened? She could've **died** tonight, Alice!"

"But she didn't ,did she?" I said back, but at the moment I said it I knew I shouldn't have. He was already mad at Jasper. I didn't need him mad at me as well.

"So, what are you suggesting? That we stick around and see what will happen the next time she tries to.  
rip off a price tag of a stupid handbag from one of your shopping trips or something, and gets cut on it?! Sounds like a real plan, Alice. Perfect."

When I heard him say that all thoughts of an apology vanished. What happened earlier was not my fault.

"Why don't you quit being such a jerk, Edward. No one knew that was going to happen earlier. Not even me." I shouted at him. He was making me angry now.

"Exactly! Not even the _psychic_ knew it was going to happen. How am I supposed to keep her safe then? Did you ever think about that, Alice?  
You know how she attracts danger. She attracted **me** for Gods sake! **Me**!" He shouted with an equal tone. I was about to say something when I heard him mumbling. "I should've left right in the beginning. I shouldn't have let it get this far."

"And what would that have done? Hurt you? Hurt her? You have to think of someone besides you. It would have hurt her if you had left." I felt the waves of calm trying to come in and calm me. I turned to Jasper. "Please stop trying to calm me down." He nodded and turned his attention away from us. I turned back to Edward now. "So, its your desision..do we leave and hurt her or stay and be more careful?"

I have to think about someone besides myself?  
Who tha hell do you think I _am_ thinking about, really? All I ever think about is Bella. I love her that much, I would never hurt her. I have done that, and I will **not **do it again. There will be no third round of 'who wants to take Bella's life?', okay? We're leaving, and that's final."

I couldn't believe he was choosing to leave. He had to know what that would do to her. But I wasnt going to argue with him anymore. I had to go say goodbye.

"Yeah okay. Well in my opinion, if you were thinking about _her_ then that decision would be different. Well I have to go say goodbye I guess." I turned to walk away and then looked back at Jasper. "Jasper you just go pack up some of our things, okay? He nodded and walked toward the stairs and turned back. "Okay,dear. Can you tell her I'm sorry when you go?"

"Yeah, I will." I said as he turned and went to pack up our belongings.

I turned back to walk out the door, when Edward was suddenly in front of me. "You're not going to say goodbye."

I stepped back a little so that I could look at him. "What the hell do you mean? I am going to say goodbye to my _best_ friend and tell her that it's not _my/_fault we are leaving."

"I will tell her myself when the time is right, and that's **not **tonight." As he said this his voice was hard and set.

"I don't see why I cant say goodbye for myself..I'm a big girl, Edward. I can do these things myself."

"Alice, I don't think she would handle that very well. You don't want to hurt Bella, do you? I think a clean break would be better for her. I will tell her you wanted to say goodbye, though. He paused for a moment, thinking I guess. "This is for the best, you know. For _her_ best." he finished as he put his hand lightly on my shoulder.

"Yeah well if you think that would be best for _her_, then I will go along with it. But only for her. And could you tell her that I love her, please?" I said looking down. I was going to miss her.

"I will." he said with a weak smile.

"Thanks." With that I turned to walk away but turned back quickly. "When do we leave? And where are we going?"

"You guys will leave in the morning. And you're heading to 'Los Angeles', meaning you can go whereever you want to. I will leave in 3 days myself, and I don't know where I'm going yet, to be honest."

"Okay well thanks again...Id better go get packed up."

"Okay."

And with that it was over. We were leaving.

I came to, alone in the room still. The flashbacks came more regularly now. It was either those or memories of a happier time. The time with Bella. More memories flooded in now. Shopping trips, make-overs, and just plain fun. A smile spread across my face at these memories.

Suddenly, the memories faded away, something else replacing them. The smile on my face disappeared, my face becoming still and blank. My eyes unfocused watched the scene intently. Just then a look of horror flashed across my face.

**PLEASE READ&REVIEW!! :) Thanks guys!**


	2. Awkward Last Words

**Hey guys! So this is chapter 2 of Never Alone. Just to clarify who writes what (since this is a collab) I will write all the girl POV's (Alice and Bella for now) and Lady (xlady_cullenx) will write all the guy POV's (Edward and Jake for now). More Pov's might be added later. But..anywho..here's Chapter 2!! **

**EDWARD POV**

Fear. That was all that was coursing through me right now. I had many reasons to feel like this, too, but of course they were the most selfish ones. I was such a selfish creature. It made me feel sick of myself, hatred even, because of what I was. I couldn't do anything right, could I? I kept hurting the ones I loved over and over again. Especially one in particular. Anger burned my unmoving body once again as I thought about what I'd done to my most beloved. Bella. Just thinking her name made me flinch. She was a taboo for me now. No longer would we be together, no longer would I destroy that one shot of a normal human-life for her. No longer would she be in my mind, no longer would she even be in my subconscious.

I couldn't deny the fact that I still loved her, though, but I would now _just_ love her like any other person in this world. No restrictions or anything like that. She'd just be Bella, one of the insignificant billions of humans on this god forsaken planet, and I'd forever be Edward, the monster without hope.

I still couldn't believe that I'd actually been accepted by one of _them_, though; that I'd actually even been loved by one of them; that I'd loved the human in return, too; that I was now irrevoccably in love with the human-girl, and the fact that my love for her would never change. It just _couldn't_ change. She was my drug, to be honest. My own special kind of heroin. Everything about her kept pulling me in deeper; kept me wanting more and more. I was so selfish! The reason why I thought of myself as selfish was because if I'd stayed behind it'd been because of _my _own desperate needs. I needed Bella; I needed my fix.

I shook my head fervently, trying to get rid off her. I wasn't allowed to think about her. She was a taboo, damnit! I'd just trigger the sirencalls, and I did not know if I was strong enough this time to resist. But I _had_ to! I had to resist my own fierce and foolish urges, to keep her safe. I had to keep her safe and sound. I must not see her again. Ever.

It felt like, I don't know, but it felt like my frozen body was ablazed. The pain seared every little inch of my cold being. I hated this pain because it was _not_ allowed as it meant I had messed up, again. I deserved this pain. I had it coming for thinking about _her_, and as I now started remembering her face, the pain increased, burning my body without mercy. My pale eyelids closed as I saw her more sharply. I found myself even more angry than before as I watched the one I loved from behind my eyelids. I couldn't remember her as clearly as I had done before. I was starting to forget what she looked like, not much, though, but it was enough to upset me immensely.

I'd sworn that I would not think of her; that I'd see her like any random person in town; that I would never allow myself to be filled with the love I yearned to give her, which was not allowed. But the idea of her slowly slipping from my mind; the way I felt whenever she touched me, the way her soft lips felt like when she kissed me, the warmth radiating from her glorious body and which made me slighlty warmer, too.. That idea was too excruciating and I hated myself for trying to remember her harder. I was _supposed_ to try and forget her, but I simply couldn't allow myself to do that. Forbidden to remember, terrified to forget – it was truly much harder than it should be.

_Argh!_

Why did _I_ have to be immortal? Why did _I_ have to be indestructible? Why did _I_ have to be a monster? Couldn't I just be mortal? Couldn't I just be as fragile as _her_? Couldn't I just be human? I was doomed to live without anything; I was doomed to live in misery. I did not know why, but apparently I had to live like this. Apparently I hadn't been through enough suffering yet.

All I ever wanted was to keep my love safe, but of course I couldn't seeing as I was what I was. I loathed myself for it, I loathed myself for being a monster. A vampire.

I closed my eyes again, once again seeing _her_ behind my eyelids. A wave of pain slowly started passing through me as my memory of Bella took me to the night when I had made my mind up;

"Edward, I already know what you're going to say alright..I saw it." Alice said, hands raised, as she and Jasper stepped into the livingroom. They'd just returned from somewhere outside, doing God only knows what. But what she did next made the pain that I'd been feeling since the incident switch to anger and annoyance. She'd stepped protectively in front of Jasper.

"Yeah. And what's that, Alice?" I couldn't hold off the irritation at the sight before me. What in the world did she think she needed to protect him from? Oh, right. Me. Of course.

"I know you're going to make us leave." She accused, and the tone in her voice made me so mad I got, perhaps, a bit overly defensive.

"Your making it sound like it's _my_ fault." I retorted, although I knew she was right. It _was_ my fault. I had made Bella fall in love with me, and now we had to deal with the consequences of that.

"No, I just think you're making too big of a deal out of all this." She said, and I couldn't believe I'd actually heard her say _that_. What the hell was she thinking?!

"'_Too_ big of a deal?'" I quoted, shouting. "Are you _joking_? Didn't you see what just happened? She could've _died_ tonight, Alice!" I exclaimed, my eyes almost bugging out in disbelief and disgust of myself. It was very hard for me to say the last part. I didn't like to talk about 'death' when it came to Bella because I knew hers was inevitable. I hated the fact we had limited time, but I still stood firmly behind my decision on keeping her human. Hadn't I been selfish enough already? I coveted her when she wasn't mine to covet in the first place. A vampire couldn't covet a human, but that didn't mean I hadn't. She was my apple, my forbidden fruit, and I had tasted it.

"But she didn't, did she?" My sister said then and that comment just made me angrier. Could you blame me? She clearly didn't understand. At all.

"So, what are you suggesting? That we stick around and see what will happen the next time she tries to... rip off a pricetag of a stupid handbag from one of your shoppingtrips or something, and gets cut on it?! Sounds like a real plan, Alice. Perfect." I said sarcastically, and very loudly. That, apparently, set her off.

"Why don't you quit being such a jerk, Edward. No one knew that was going to happen earlier. Not even me." This was just getting better, although, finally she seemed to get where I was coming from.

"Exactly! Not even the _psychic_ knew it was going to happen. How am I supposed to keep her safe then? Did you ever think about that, Alice? You know how she attracts danger. She attracted _me_ for Gods sake! _Me_!" I shouted, and then added under my breath; "I should've left right in the beginning. I shouldn't have let it get this far." It was true. I should've been stronger and never returned the first time I left, which was the first day I met her. I hated myself now for not doing what I should've done so many months ago. She would've been safe then, safe away from me.

"And what would that have done? Hurt you? Hurt her? You have to think of someone besides you. It would have hurt her if you had left." She turned towards Jasper with a slightly annoyed look on her tiny, pixie-like face. "Please stop trying to calm me down." After that she turned back towards me, and continued; "So, it's your decision..do we leave and hurt her or stay and be more careful?"

I turned to look at Jasper at the same time as Alice did, as I felt the sudden calmness in the room, too, but turned quickly back towards her. "I have to think about someone besides myself? Who tha hell do you think I _am_ thinking about, really? All I ever think about is Bella. I love her that much, I would never hurt her. I have done that, and I will _not_ do it again. There will be no third round of 'who wants to take Bella's life?', okay? We're leaving, and that's final." As I said it, a tone of finality was heard in my voice. Thankfully it was acknowledged and Alice backed down.

"Yeah okay. Well in my opinion, if you were thinking about _her_ then that decision would be different. Well I have to go say goodbye I guess." She turned to walk away, but hastily looked back at her husband. "Jasper, you just go pack up some of our things, okay?"

"Okay, dear. Can you tell her I'm sorry when you go?" He asked her.

"Yeah, I will." She told him, and then he turned to walk upstairs and pack.

I on the other hand went to stand in front of her, stopping her from going to Bella's to say goodbye. That wouldn't be good. "You're not going to say goodbye." I told her firmly.

"What the hell do you mean? I am going to say goodbye to my _best_ friend and tell her that it's not _my_ fault we are leaving." She cried, and I didn't miss the accusation in her statement. But I ignored it for now.

"I will tell her myself when the time is right, and that's _not_ tonight." I said in a very hard voice, not too common in my velvet voice anymore. I had not been like this since I met Bella. She made me happy, feel hopeful again, which was two feelings I had not felt for a very long time. She woke up the human in me.

"I dont see why I can't say goodbye for myself..I'm a big girl, Edward. I can do these things myself." She said rather sadly, and that made me soften slightly because I saw how much Alice loved her, too.

"Alice, I don't think she would handle that very well. You don't want to hurt Bella, do you? I think a clean break would be better for her. I will tell her you wanted to say goodbye, though." I paused, not sure of how to proceed. I had to convince her that Bella was better off without us, and I desperately hoped she would see that now. "This is for the best, you know. For _her_ best." I put one hand lightly on her shoulder as I said the last part.

"Yeah well if you think that would be best for _her_, then I will go along with it. But only for her. And could you tell her that I love her, please?" She looked down, and I could see what this would do to her. I felt bad for it, but I couldn't put Alice's happiness before Bella's safety. As long as Bella was safe, I'd be happy, and hopefully Alice would be happy, too.

"I will." I told her, and smiled weakly.

"Thanks." She said softly and turned to walk away, but quickly turned back to me. "When do we leave? And where are we going?"

"You guys will leave in the morning. And you're heading to 'Los Angeles', meaning you can go whereever you want to. I will leave in three days myself, and I don't know where I'm going yet, to be honest." I really didn't. All I thought about was Bella's safety and so I hadn't had time to focus on myself. But I figured I'd go somewhere further up north seeing as I couldn't really be in the south because of the sun there.

"Okay well thanks again...Id better go get packed up." She said, and I just mumbled, "Okay." in response.

After that conversation I'd walked up to my room to think. I was going to break up with Bella in a matter of days then, and it had pained me to do so. I hated goodbyes, especially this one. It still pained me to think about it, but it had been a necessary one. It was her _safety_ on the line, and 'vampire boyfriend, including vampire family with a few problems' was not exactly what I would call safe.

I'd kept thinking about how I would actually do it because I had no idea how you really broke up with someone. I'd never done it before as I'd never been in a relationship in my entire existence. I knew I'd have to hurt her badly, though, which was something I didn't want to do. Ever. But it was a necessity of course. I would have to convince her that I didn't love her anymore, and I knew it was going to be the hardest thing I'd ever done, and would ever do, in my entire lifetime.

As I thought about what I would do soon, another memory popped into my mind. It was from earlier this evening, at Bella's house, and we were sitting on her narrow bed. She'd just gotten ready for bed and when she entered her room, she approached me after I'd said "Hi." in a not so cheerful tone I could imagine, taking away the presents in my hands to place herself in my lap. "Hi." She said softly, snuggling into my icy chest. "Can I open my presents now?" That took me by surprise.

"Where did the enthusiasm come from?"

"You made me curious." Was all she said, and it made me wonder, once again, what she was thinking. She reached for her birthday presents and grabbed the one my parents had got for her. "Allow me," I said as I took the gift from her tiny hands and opened it in a swift movement to prevent further bloodshed. I would not be able to handle that on my own, without anyone to stop me. I handed it back to her.

"Are you sure I can handle lifting the lid?" She muttered, clearly irritated, but I ignored it.

I waited a few moments for a reaction, and when she finally did react, she took me off guard again. "We're going to Jacksonville?" She asked, seeming to be very excited all of a sudden.

"That's the idea." I told her, but I knew we'd never go there together. So, it was a lie. The first lie in the _really _big lie.

"I can't believe it. Renée is going to flip! You don't mind, though, do you? It's sunny, you'll have to stay inside all day."

"I think I can handle it," I told her, but then I frowned as I realized something. "If I'd had any idea that you could respond to a gift this appropriately, I would have made you open it in front of Carlisle and Esme. I thought you'd complain."

"Well, of course it's too much. But I get to take you with me!" She smiled then, and she looked so beautiful, just like an angel. I chuckled. "Now I wish I'd spent money on your present. I didn't realize that you were capable of being reasonable." I wasn't sure if I wanted to, though. Before all of this I'd loved to buy things for her, but I didn't now. Not anymore, really. It'd be a goodbye present then, and I didn't want to leave her with something like that. I wanted to leave her with something from myself, not a meaningless object that I'd spent money on, which was a gesture I knew she didn't like. I didn't want to make her mad like that before I left. I was trying to make this farewell smooth.

Then she was going to open the next one, the one from me and Alice, but just like the previous one, I took it from her and opened it. I gave her the clear CD jewel case with the cd, containing my very own compositions, inside.

"What is it?" She asked, sounding confused.

I didn't bother to answer as I took the CD and put it into her CD player that had laid on her bedside table earlier. I hit play and then we just sat in silence, waiting at first, and then listening to my music.

I looked over at her, waiting for her reaction, wondering if it would surprise me again. I doubted that it wouldn't. But then tears started welling up in her beautiful, brown eyes and she reached up to wipe them away immediately. I didn't know if it was the music or her arm that made her cry, and I got anxious. "Does your arm hurt?"

"No, it's not my arm. It's beautiful, Edward. You couldn't have given me anything I would love more. I can't believe it." She went quiet after that and I guessed she just wanted to listen. It made me happy that she liked it for I knew I would hurt her very soon. At least she could be happy for a little while now. That was the least I could do, going along with what she said and did. I just played my part for her sake, until it was time to say goodbye.

"I didn't think you would let me get a piano so I could play for you here." I told her, which had been true before. I had planned on getting one so I could play for her even if we were hanging out at her house, but now that was not going to happen. Ever.

"You're right."

"How does your arm feel?" I asked, again. I knew her and she was being brave, not showing how much it really hurt.

"Just fine." She said, obviously a lie.

"I'll get you some Tylenol."

"I don't need anything." She insisted, but I ignored her, sliding her off of me and I went over to the door.

"Charlie." She hissed at me, but I ignored her again. I knew I wouldn't get caught.

"He won't catch me." I ran quickly into their bathroom and looked in the cabinets for some Tylenol, which I found immediately and therefore it took only seconds for me to return to her bedroom with a waterfilled glass and the bottle with pills. She took the pills without a fuss, which surprised me again. So, I knew she had lied then for sure. Her arm really did hurt.

"It's late," I said as I saw what time it was on her alarmclock. She should be sleeping now. I picked her up with one arm, without a problem, and pulled the cover back with my other hand and gently put her down, tucking her in. Then I slowly laid down beside her, on top of her blankets of course, and put my arm around her.

"Thanks again," She whispered into my ear.

"You're welcome."

And then we were silent again, just listening to the lullaby I'd written for her. It was coming to an end. _Just like our relationship_, I thought sadly as it ended and another began. Esme's song.

I didn't want to leave, but I had to. I had to keep her safe. It was wrong for me to stay here and keep her in constant danger just so that I could be with her. I was so selfish for wanting that.

Right for me, well, both of us, was that I would stay away from her, to keep her safe. Without me she could live a normal human life, she could meet someone that she could be with without fearing to break any boundaries, she could marry and have children..

"What are you thinking about?" She asked quietly, and to my surprise, I told her the truth. "I was thinking about right and wrong, actually."

Suddenly she switched the subject, surprising me yet again, but not as much as before, though. She must've sensed that something was up, I guessed.

"Remember how I decided that I wanted you to _not_ ignore my birthday?" She asked me, and I realized that she really had sensed that something was going on. She just didn't know what, and I think she was afraid of what it could be.

"Yes," I said, feeling rather wary. I never knew what was going on inside that brain of hers, I swear.

"Well, I was thinking, since it's still my birthday, that I'd like you to kiss me again." Of course she would say that.

"You're greedy tonight."

"Yes, I am – but please, don't do anything you don't want to do." She teased me, sounding piqued. I had to laugh at that, but then I sighed.

"Heaven forbid that I should do anything I don't want to do." I thought about when I was going to leave her. I loved her so much, and I didn't want to leave, but I had to. I did it for her sake, not mine.

I put my hand under her warm chin, pulling her face up to mine. I looked into her chocolate brown eyes for a second before I granted her wish, leaning in and started kissing her slowly, carefully. But then I realized that this was probably our last kiss. Ever.

Desperation took hold off me and the kiss became more urgent, much fiercer than usual. I twisted my free hand into her brown hair so I could hold her face to my own for awhile longer. _While I still can_, I thought. She started twisting her hands into my hair, too, and I wanted to moan as she pressed her body against me. I knew we were crossing some boundaries, but this was the end, I reminded myself. This was our last kiss, this was our last happiness.

I stopped abruptly as I felt it was really getting too far, but I pulled myself away gently, not to hurt her.

She fell back onto the pillows, gasping for air. "Sorry," I said, breathless, too, after the make-out session. "That was out of line." I was pretty sure she would protest, and she didn't disappoint me. "_I_ don't mind." She panted in the darkness. Of course she didn't.

"Try to sleep, Bella."

"No, I want you to kiss me again."

"You're overestimating my self-control." I told her. I couldn't do it again, I was too afraid of hurting her as I wanted to go further, too. It didn't help, knowing she wanted more as well as me.

"Which is tempting you more, my blood or my body?" She asked, and it made me grin reluctantly. "It's a tie." But I wasn't going to get sidetracked again by her attempts to distract me. "Now, why don't you stop pushing your luck and go to sleep?" I asked, now serious.

"Fine," She muttered and snuggled closer to me. After awhile I could feel she was slipping into unconsciousness, but before that she pressed her injured arm against my cool shoulder, and immediately I knew her arm was bothering her again. That made me feel more secure about my decision. Leaving her was the right thing to do. I no longer had any doubts.

That night, after Bella had finally fallen asleep, I'd gone back to my house to talk to Carlisle about my decision. He told me that if that's what I wanted they'd all leave without complaints. He, of course, had to talk to Rosalie himself. She'd rip my head off I would have been in the same room. I knew how much she hated to move around so much.

But she'd be happy about the fact that Bella would no longer be in our lives, something I completley disagreed about. She was the love of my life. I knew I'd never find someone else like her, and I didn't want to either.

After our conversation I walked back to my room and started thinking about ways to do it. It took me awhile to come up with something, but when I did I began to try and distance myself from her. I tried pushing the feelings I had for her away, so that I wouldn't mess this up. She just had to believe me, and I knew it was going to be _hard_.

The next day, when she woke up, I'd kissed her forehead before I left her house to go back to my own, to say temporary goodbyes to my familymembers. They all seemed to be quite moody, even Rosalie, and that was a sight I didn't like.

At the moment they were packing all of their belongings into the cars. Carlisle was carrying one of Esme's bags and putting it into the trunk of the Mercedes when Alice came outside with a big, pink suitcase that was threatening to burst any moment, and a look on her face that made me feel even more bad. She looked extremely sad, and if she'd been human I was sure she'd bawl her little eyes out. That got me to think of Bella, and I wondered how she'd react when I would tell her.

Of course I already knew how she'd reacted as my present was now about four months after, and I was in South America at the moment. I was trying my hands on tracking, but I wasn't doing too well. I thought I'd tracked Victoria, the vile redhead that had been James's partner, here, but she was nowhere to be found. I'd lost her, again.

My mind went back to Bella quite quickly, as usual, even though I tried not to think about her at all. It was hopeless to believe that I'd ever stop thinking about her. She was still my everything. Unwillingly my memory took me back to the afternoon in the woods outside her house;

I waited for her to come home, sitting in my car, just staring at the clock on the dashboard as the minutes slowly passed by. I was beginning to have second thoughts to be honest, but I had to remind myself that this was for the best, for _her_ best. I couldn't keep hurting her like I did. That just made me even more of a monster.

As I heard her old truck coming in the distance I began bracing myself. This was it.

When she pulled up in the front of the car, and got out, I did the same. I walked over to her and as she grabbed her book bag, I took it from her, but instead of carrying it like I normally did I just put it back in her car. She seemed a little surprised by this, and I didn't blame her. After all, this was the end. Things tended to change at points like these.

"Come for a walk with me," I suggested, starting to execute my plan, whilst taking her warm hand in mine. She didn't say anything, so she must've been in shock or something. But I never knew with her, so I couldn't be completely sure.

I started walking, leading her into the trees on the east side of the Swan's yard. We didn't walk far into the little forest, just a few steps into it.

I leaned back against a tree and looked over at her, trying to detach myself yet again. Fortunately I could do so successfully.

I didn't know how to start, really, so I just waited for her to say something. And she did.

"Okay, let's talk," She said, sounding quite nonchalant to my surprise. As always.

I took a deep breath, steadying myself, before I spoke.

"Bella, we're leaving." It was final now. No going back. It tore at my heart, but it was a necessary pain. I kept reminding myself that this was the best thing for her, and that made me able to do this.

I waited, again, for her to speak. She took a deep breath, before she replied.

"Why now? Another year-" I cut her off to explain, wanting this to be quick because I wasn't sure if I would be able to keep the facade up for long.

"Bella, it's time. How much longer could we stay in Forks, after all? Carlisle can barely pass for thirty, and he's claiming thirty-three now. We'd have to start over soon regardless."

She looked confused as I said it, and I used that to my advantage, trying to distance myself further from her. She was quiet for awhile, again, before speaking up, quietly;

"When you say _we_-"

"I mean my family and myself." I chose my words carefully, not wanting to lead her on somehow because that would cause both of us even more pain. At least I knew that I would be in pain if she was. Seeing that look of hurt on her face was going to be a real challenge for me, and so was the 'I don't love you' bit. I hadn't planned on saying that exactly, but I had to get that message out at least. That would be the only way for her to move on with her life, and forget about me. I _needed_ her to forget about me.

It took awhile for her to answer me, but when she finally did, it tore a bit in my heart.

"Okay, I'll come with you." She wasn't going to let go.

"You can't, Bella. Where we're going... It's not the right place for you."

"Where you are is the right place for me." _No._

She was going to kill me if she kept this up. "I'm no good for you, Bella." _That's the truth._

"Don't be ridiculous." She said, almost pleading. "You're the very best part of my life." _No, I'm not!_

"My world is not for you."

"What happened with Jasper – that was nothing, Edward! Nothing!" Finally she was beginning to get it, at least a little bit.

"You're right. It was exactly what was to be expected."

"You promised! In Phoenix, you promised that you would stay-" _I _want_ to stay!_

"As long as that was best for you." I reminded her. _And I'm _not_ the best for you._

"_No!_ This is about my soul, isn't it?" She suddenly shouted at me, and it got to me real bad. I hadn't exactly been thinking about that, not for awhile anyway. Not until now. Not until she brought it up. "Carlisle told me about that, and I don't care, Edward. I don't care! You can have my soul. I don't want it without you – it's yours already!"

I had to try and remain calm, although it was really difficult after having her shout _that_ at me. I didn't ever want to hear that. I would not take her soul from her, I would not ruin her life. I took a deep breath, while staring at the ground, trying to think, not knowing completely what to say to that. All I knew was that I had to make her realize that this was it, for real. There _was_ no going back.

"Bella, I don't want you to come with me." I said the words really slowly, as it was the hardest thing I'd ever said in my entire existence. Of course I wanted her to come with me! I wanted nothing more than to be with her! But I wasn't what was right for her. She deserved so much better.

She didn't say anything for awhile after that, and I could see that she was trying to absorb what I'd just told her. The selfish part of me wished that she wouldn't, and the more rational part of me begged for her to finally realize that I was not the one for her. That part just wanted her to move on, as it would be better for her.

"You... don't... want me?" She said slowly, and as she said it, I could feel my heart ache even more badly. It was so untrue, but still true to her.

"No."

She stared right into my eyes, and I just looked back at her, not allowing myself to feel anything for her.

"Well, that changes things." I was taken aback by the tone in her voice. She said it so calmly!

I had to let her know one thing though, and I couldn't look her in the eyes when I said it because I knew I would ruin this then. She would see right through me.

"Of course, I'll always love you... in a way. But what happened the other night made me realize that it's time for a change. Because I'm... _tired_ of pretending to be something I'm not, Bella. I am not human. I've let this go on much too long, and I'm sorry for that."

"Don't." She pleaded, obviously realizing what was really happening. "Don't do this." _I have to!_

"You're not good for me, Bella." I turned my words around, knowing that this would be the final blow. She had low self-esteem, and so she wouldn't argue with that, seeing as she thought that I was "perfect" and "beautiful", and that she didn't measure up.

She opened her mouth a few times, trying to speak, but she just closed it again and again, until..

"If... that's what you want."

I couldn't answer that, for I knew my voice would break when I said "Yes." as I absolutely didn't want this, so I just nodded once.

"I would like to ask for a favor, though, if that's not too much." I said after awhile, remembering something that would otherwise haunt me to no end if I didn't ask.

"Anything."

As I spoke I couldn't help but to say it more softly. "Don't do anything reckless or stupid." I pleaded. "Do you understand what I'm saying?"

She nodded.

And now I had to lie again, not to lead her on in any way. "I'm thinking of Charlie, of course. He needs you. Take care of youself – for him." _For me._

She nodded again, whispering; "I will."

Thank heavens.

"And I'll make you a promise in return," I began. "I promise that this will be the last time you'll see me. I won't come back. I won't put you through anything like this again. You can go on with yourlife without any more interference from me. It will be as if I'd never existed." _Which I shouldn't even._

I heard her heartbeat increasing then.

"Don't worry." I told her, smiling gently at her. "You're human – your memory is no more than a sieve. Time heals all wounds for your kind."

"And your memories?" She asked me, sounding like she was choking. And I was choking, too, but internally. So many lies I'd told her now, and they just kept on coming!

"Well," I began, hesitating slightly. "I won't forget. But _my_ kind... we're very easily distracted." I smiled at her, but it was not a genuine one.

After I'd said that I took a step away from her, getting ready to leave. I needed to leave _soon_. I wasn't sure if I could handle much more of this.

"That's everything, I suppose. We won't bother you again."

Her facial expression changed, and apparently something dawned on her.

"Alice isn't coming back." She stated, very quietly.

I shook my head slowly, never looking away from her face.

"No. They're all gone. I stayed behind to tell you goodbye."

"Alice is gone?"

"She wanted to say goodbye," I remembered our conversation then, and decided not to tell her that Alice said that she loved her. I didn't think Bella would be able to take that; We tell her we love her, and then leave. I knew Bella, and she wouldn't be able to handle that very well. She'd think that something was wrong with her, like always. "But I convinced her that a clean break would be better for you."

I paused for a bit, just watching her as she tried to remain calm. "Goodbye, Bella," I said quietly as she was beginning to finally breath more normally.

"Wait!" she cried, reaching out for me. I put my hands around her wrist, pinning them to her sides. She closed her eyes as I leaned down, kissing her on the forehead one last time.

"Take care of yourself."

And those were my last words before my world crumbled to pieces.

I couldn't take it anymore. Being away from her was getting to be too much for me as I could no longer stop thinking about her for even an hour at a time. I clenched and unclenched my fists repeatedly, not knowing what to do. I couldn't go back, but I couldn't stay like this either. I needed my heroin badly, but she was nowhere near me. I was in South America and she was safe, I hoped, in Forks. And that thought made my frozen heart ache, for I had no idea if she was alright or not. Knowing Bella she could be in the hospital right now, and here I was sitting, not doing anything to help her. But I couldn't, could I?! She wasn't mine anymore. We were _not_ together, and I could more or less feel my heart shatter internally once again at the thought. I had to make this pain go away, now, for it was literally driving me crazy. I had to go back. I would crawl on my hands and knees and beg for her forgiveness, and hopefully she would accept it. I would once again, after so long, find myself in her arms, and she would sigh my name contently while I pulled her closer, and brushing my lips against hers for as long as I could muster. Hopefully that would be forever.

I could feel the hope starting to seep into my veins, filling every inch of my being up. I needed to go back, I needed to be with my Bella, I needed my lovedrug.

**When I read this for the first time I was like W-O-W, because it was SOOO Edward-ish. But I couldnt expect anything but fantastic from Lady cause she rocks! :) :) **

**But if you guys liked this, let us know :)  
**


	3. Unwell

**Hey guys. I'm glad you all are liking the story. There is a lot more to come though. :) This is Bella's POV, written by me, Jordan aka Tiger. But here it is...hope I pulled off an okay depressed Bella. :) **

**BPOV**

I heard the alarm clock but I wasnt ready to get up and face the rest of the world. I dont know if I ever will be. It had been two weeks already but I didnt care. I couldnt get over something that was so real and meant so much to me in that short amount of time. It was going to take forever.

I felt the rays of the sun shining in upon my face from the near window. I pulled the covers over my head and turned around. Today was Saturday and so I had no school. Only another day of loneliness and sadness was ahead of me.

I felt the pain as the memories that had haunted me since those two long weeks started seeping into my thoughts. I tried to push them away and pull the covers over my head more, but nothing would keep them away. I would have them with me for the rest of my life. Until the day I die. I still fought to not hear the words and see his face in my mind. I couldnt bear it.

The words and images flooded my mind. His cold hard face, unemotionless and rigid. The eyes that stared back at me now unfamiliar. The words like weights on my heart.

"Y-you dont want me?" "No." he had said. I remember the sting of the words as they left his mouth. I remember feeling as if I could die right then and none of it mattering one bit. But most of all I remeber the look on his face. Nothing. That was the look. No remorse or regret. Just a blank stare.

It didnt hit me until he turned and dissapeared leaving me in the woods alone, that he had gone. My angel was gone..leaving me with nothing. That's what I had in the world now. Nothing. He was gone and would never come back.

Part of me wanted to understand his reason for doing what he did to me, but I just couldnt comprehend it. I guess it was my love for him. I guess that was my moving force behind how I was able to be with him and accept him for who and what he was.

I laid there under the covers. They were my security now. My shield from the outside world. They had his scent on them still from the nights when he came and watched me sleep.

My curtains were drawn. I wanted no light whereas mine was gone.  
My schoolwork was piled up on my desk from the past few days I had missed. I had no drive or desire to do anything. I was so different now, even to myself. I barely left my room anymore. I knew I would have to face my classmates again eventually, but I wasnt ready right now.

I wasnt sure if I would really ever be entirely ready, but I will deal with that soon enough.

I felt the covers around me and let the rest of the world just melt away. I closed my eyes and felt as the darkness of entering sleep overcame me.

It had been nearly two months now. The days went by slowly but I managed somehow. There was still something there. It was like the flame of a candle, it was intense when Edward was here but now that he was gone, it was slowly going out. Slowly but surely. I thought it would go out a lot sooner, that I'd be totally unable to make contact with anyone ever again. I could still talk to Charlie but not very much, he didnt understand. I barely called or emailed my mom. She didnt understand either. No one did. I never spoke to Jessica or Mike or Angela and Eric. They were all happy with each other but I was alone now.

I pushed the covers away from me and slung my legs around and slid off the bed. I still had those stupid human needs. The ones that made me so different from my love. The things about me that ended up driving him away. Why couldnt I just be like them? Why wouldnt he change me? My eyes watered as I made my way to the door, openeing it and running to the bathroom. I closed the door and went to the mirror. I needed a shower. Bad. My hair was all greasy and tangled. My eyes red and puffy with purplish circles under them. I had been in the same clothes for the past three days.

Going over to the shower, I started the water. I got undressed and got in. I washed my hair with my favorite strawberry shampoo and let the air fill with the smell of it. It calmed me down. I finished quite quickly and got out and dried off. In my towel, I ran back to my room in search of clothes. I found some faded jeans and a plain t-shirt. Alice would not approve. But then again, she was gone too. I grabbed my converse and some socks. Slipping the socks on and putting the shoes on, I went back to the bathroom to blowdry my hair. I found the blowdryer under the cabinet and plugged it in.

The warm air from the blowdryer blew my hair in every direction, but it felt good. My hair was now warm on my neck and face. It felt good to be dressed and clean and out of my room for a change. I went downstairs to fix something to eat but when I walked down the stairs, the memories started again.

I remembered standing in the forest all alone wanting to cry but forcing the tears back. I remembered hoping he would come back and say it was all a sick joke. And most of all I remember that never happening.

I came to only to find myself sitting on the stairs, crying. I picked myself up. I couldnt continue on like this. Could I? No. I had to do something. I could think of nothing I wanted to do more than to go back to my bed and curl up under my comforter and sleep. I wanted to sleep. To be away from everything and everyone. I could trust no one now. How would I know they wouldn't just leave me one day just like Edward had? I couldnt ever be so sure of someone again. I see the consequences of putting your whole trust and confidence and love into someone. It got me here. A situation where I could think of nothing but him and the things he said in the woods that day. Thinking of him and his of Alice and Jasper and how much this affected them.

These thoughts were so normal for me now that I had learned to deal with them. I wasnt one to call someone on the phone and pour my heart out to them. I am very much like my dad in that way. ______________________________________________

I stood at the refridgerator now, looking for food. I hadnt cooked at all in the last month or so. Charlie had been going out to eat. I found leftovers from the diner downtown. I got the box and a plate. Putting the food over on the plate I slid in the microwave and let it heat up. It was my cheeseburger from the day before that I hadnt eaten.

The microwave went off and I pulled the plate out and went back up the stairs to my room. Charlie was at work and so I was alone. I ate my food and sat the plate on my desk along with my school work. Looking at all the work that had accumulated, I sighed as I sat and began to work on all the stuff I had missed. I finished over half of the work and was happy with the way it kept my mind off him. Then, I got to the Biology work I had missed. I remembered the way he had acted toward me that day and seeing his family in the cafeteria the first day at Forks High and thinking to myself how gorgeous they were. Remembering the week he was gone after the first day in Biology was painful because it reminded me he was gone again, never to return. I remembered his face then. The crooked smile. The pools of liqud butterscotch. The clear and perfect skin, blemish free. I remembered the feel of his bronze, dissarayed hair beneath my fingertips whenever we kissed. The coldness of his body against mine when he pulled me close. A small smile came across my face but was replaced with a frown. I loved the memories like this but they also hurt me. The fact that I would never see that crooked smile and butterscotch eyes, or feel the smoothness of his hair or the coldness of hos body again. And that made all the progress I had made earlier in the day to fade.

I almost fainted when I heard the velvet voice in the room with me. I turned to my closed window and looked around seeing no one. But the voice. It was still here. "Go out. Have fun." it said. I closed my eyes imagining the owner of that voice..imagining he was still here. I could almost feel his cold hands cradling my face. I could smell the intoxicating scent of his breath. I opened my eyes to find myself still alone. I had to do something. I closed my books and went out of my room.

Running down the stairs, I grabbed the phone off of its dock and dialed a number. Jessica Stanley. I heard the ring on the other end of the line and slammed the phone back not yet. Im not ready for that yet. I paced around next to the phone. I looked at the clock. Charlie would be home soon and he'd be hungry.

I ran to the cabinet and opened it, taking out some noodles and a can of spaghetti sauce. I looked under the counter and found a nice sized pot and filled it about halfway with water and cut the stove on and sat the pot down. Finally, the water came to a boil and I dumped the noodles in and set the timer for 10 minutes.

I ran to the fridge and grabbed a can of beer and opened it, sitting it in front of Charlie's spot. I got a class from the cabinet and got some water for me. The timer went off and I rushed to turn it off and got the drainer and dumped the noodles in it over the sink. I sat them there, letting them drain and got the saucepan out and put it on the stove. I poured the sauce in and ran to the drawer to grab a spoon to stir the sauce so it wouldnt burn and stick to the pan. It didnt take long for the sauce to heat up. Darn. No garlic bread. I ran to the other cabinet, closer to the fridge, and pulled out the loaf bread. I got two peices and popped them in the toaster. After they were done i put some butter on them.

I got our plates and put some noodles and sauce on them, followed by bread. I saw the lights from the cruiser come into the driveway as I was cleaning up the excess mess. I heard Charlie fiddling with his keys as I placed the plates down. When he walked in I greeted him with a small smile.

"Hi Dad."

"Hi, Bells. What's all this about?"

"Oh I thought that cooking dinner would be good for me."

"Oh to get your mind of...them."

"What?"

"Well I just thought you might mean to keep your mind off the..um..Cullens."

"Can't I just do something nice for my father without it having to do with them?!?" I asked trying to cover up the fact that he was utterly and completely right.

"Sorry Bells, you just havent been the same and I miss you."

I looked at Charlie. I didnt know why I was acting like this. He hadnt done anything to me but care.

"Well Im sorry too..Its not my fault. I cant just get over him. This place just has so many memories."

"Well that's what I thought too..so um..I called your mother."

"You did what?!" I asked, my voice rising just a bit.

"Well I called her to take you back with her for a bit..just to let you calm down from all this."

"IM NOT GOING WITH HER! YOU CANNOT MAKE ME LEAVE! I WILL BE HERE IF HE COMES BACK!" I yelled across the table standing up.

"Bella, he wont come back. I wish you would just see that and move on."

"You dont know what you are talking about!" I retorted.

I turned around and ran up the stairs to my room. I heard Charlie yell something like 'This isnt good for you and you know it', but I chose to ignore him. I wasnt going to make this any worse than it already was. I slammed the door, unintentionally, but Charlie never came up and for that I was glad.

I went over and took off my shoes and threw myself on the bed and pulled the covers over my head. I laid there for a while before the darkness of sleep overtook me. The dream came slowly but got sharper and clearer it went by. I saw the figure, dark at first. It was in the shadows and I was walking cautiously to it. It stepped closer to me and into the sun. My hand flew to my face as the figure started to shine like a million diamonds. I knew at once it was Edward and ran toward him. The dream was so real.

"You came back!" I heard myself scream to him.

"No Bella, Im not really here." The velvet voice came out harsh and cold. I stepped back.

"Wha-What do you mean? You came back to me just like I hoped you would. Oh Im just so happy you're here. I-"I said before I let my emotions overtake me. I stepped closer to him now and wrapped my arms tightly around him and felt the coolness of his hands on my shoulders. I laid my head on his chest and didnt realize I was crying until I woke up to my room.

I looked at the clock. It was 6:30 am. I had slept through the night. Getting up out of bed, I went downstairs only to find my mother and father sitting at the table talking. About me, I assumed.

"Oh hi Bells." I heard Charlie say.

"Um hi." I said stepping toward the table.

"Hi Bella." I looked toward my mom as she spoke.

"Hi mom." I said with a slight smile going to sit at the table. "What's this all about?"

"Well Bella," my mother started, "I think you should come back with me."

"Now Bells, before you just say no, just think about it. Please?" I looked at Charlie as he spoke.

"No! Im not going. I told you last night Im not going anywear." I said with an irritated tone.

"But baby, you need to get away from here for a while. Me and Phil have a new home you'll love. You're room is ready for you to move in."

"I dont want to go! Why cant you all just stop! Im not leaving and that's final." I yelled as I got up.

"Now Bella...why cant you just think about this?" Charlie asked.

"Because there is /nothing to think about. He /will/ come back. He will." I said iritably.

"Bella." Charlie started off calmly. "How many times do I have to tell you? He's not coming back, Bells. Why dont you just move on? There are other guys. What about Mike Newton, he's always had an eye for you. Then of course there's Jacob Black, he's a nice boy."

"What did you just say?!?" I asked, my eyes starting to get wider. I could feel the anger rushing through me now. " MIKE OR JACOB?! ARE YOU KIDDING ME DAD? MIKE?!?!?" I closed my eyes and breathed in. I needed to calm down. I felt the tears as the started to fall down my face. "Never mention him again, dad. I love Edward and /only/ Edward. I dont want any other guy. Its not that simple dad." I screamed through my tears. I couldnt handle this right that I turned to my mother. "Im sorry you had to come all the way out here just to go back without me, but I cant leave. I wont leave."

My mother went silent and I knew she was hurt. I couldnt help it. I wasnt going to leave and she couldnt make me.

I stormed off to my room. I didnt listen to the rest of their conversation. I heard the goodbye and the door close. Hearing the footsteps of Charlie coming up to my room, I laid on the bed and turned away from the door.

"Um hey Bells." he said as he walked in.

I didnt say anything or move.

"Well I just wanted to let you know that Im going fishing with Billy tomorrow and would really prefer if you weren't home alone."

"Alright, Ill call Jessica or Angela." I said still laying there.

"Okay you go and do that." he said walking out of the room.

I sat up and got my phone from my nightstand. I dialed Jessica's number and put the phone to my ear. It rang and rang unil I heard the high pitched voice on the other end of the reciever.

"Hi."

"Hi, Jess."

"Oh Bella, I wasnt sure who it was at first..I havent heard from you in a while."

"Yeah I know, Im sorry about that."

"Its fine. So um what's up?"

"Oh I was wandering if you had plans tomorrow."

"Oh yeah me and Angela are going out with the guys."

"Oh.."

"You can come if you want."

"Im fine, but thanks anyway."

"Okay well bye Bella."

"Bye Jess." I said hanging up the phone.

I went down to the living room and saw Charlie watching some ball game on TV.

"Hey dad, um Jess and Angela are both busy."

"Oh okay..umm how about you come down to La Push with me then. You can hang out with the kids down there and go swimming or something."

"I guess.." I said turning around and walking out of the room. I turned around, "Im sorry I yelled earlier dad."

"Its all right, Bells."

"Love you dad."

"Love you too. Now go get some rest."

I went up to my room and crawled in bed. I needed rest after earlier. I drifted off to sleep as the velvet voice hummed my song softly. The day ahead of me would be long and hard, but I would have to get through it.

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